Too many Legos
A boy had just returned from a play date at a friend’s house. The friend had an impressive amount of Legos. Before the date, the boy would have never known someone could own so many Legos. There were thousands of pieces, all of which seemed to be a unique color. You could build a skyscraper from the plethora of bricks, and then another, and another, until you’d built an entire city. Next you could build a colossal monster to ransack the city, followed by a full-force army to clash with the monster. The battle was legendary.
By comparison, the boy’s supply of Legos was nonexistent. In fact he only had enough to build a single building, a pterodactyl, and a tank. The battle was wimpy. It hadn’t always been wimpy. Beforehand it had been great fun, but that feeling went away after having visited the friend’s house. The boy knew he had the ability to command armies, but his skills were wasted on a single infantry unit. The inequality made the boy sad. It was hard to enjoy the few Legos he did have knowing that the experience could be improved.
The boy went to his parents and asked them to buy him more Legos. They said ok. They followed up by asking how many more Legos to buy. The boy asked them to please buy “all the Legos”, a product from Amazon guarantying you’ll never be in want again. They said ok again. His parents made the purchase on Amazon and three days later a package arrived at the house.
The package was relatively small - 4 inches for each dimension. The boy ripped open the box. For him, this wasn’t a want good but a need good. Inside he found a single glowing Lego. The piece radiated light. The boy was confused, not by the light but by the quantity. He showed the disappointing package to his parents saying that he wanted more and this was less. His parents checked their purchase history and confirmed they did indeed purchase “all the Legos”.
Obviously that wasn’t true, all the boy had was a single Lego. His parents reassured him that as soon as their new credit card arrived at the end of the month, they would re-purchase “all the Legos”. That would be two weeks away, which was an eternity to wait. The boy cried himself to sleep.
The next day, the boy found that the package was glowing ever-so more brightly then the day before. Looking inside, the boy now found two glowing Legos. He thought nothing of it. Maybe he hadn’t done a thorough investigation when the box first arrived. He checked again and confirmed the box contained a dismal total of two legos. He tossed the two Legos into the trash
8 days later, the boy’s parents were taking out the trash. His dad noticed one trashcan was glowing. When he looked inside he found Legos, at least 200 Legos, all glowing. The dad showed the discovery to the boy and the boy was ecstatic. The boy realized that they had indeed bought “all the Legos”. The Legos were slowly multiplying.
The boy started to build and each day he awoke to exponentially more legos. It seemed that each night the Legos doubled. The boy waited up one night to see it happen and confirmed that at 12:00 am each night, the Legos doubled. The boy was finally happy. He knew that he’d continue to get more Legos until he had them all. He built an entire landscape. Mountains that rose on the east side of his room, forests on the west side of his room, and countless more tundras. He built small villages and great cities. The cities grew into nations which quickly raised armies leading to epic battles. Everyday the boy added to his masterpiece. The Legos continued to multiply and he was happy.
Eventually it got to the point where the Legos filled half of the entire house. The family had to wade through a sea of plastic to get from the living room to kitchen, the kitchen to the bathroom, the bathroom to the bedrooms… It was at the point where the parents finally spoke up to the boy telling him he’d have to get rid of some of the Legos. A heated fight ensued. The boy swore that he wouldn’t throw any of the Legos away. These were his Legos and he wasn’t going to give them up. His parents, at the breaking point and tired of Lego related injuries, shouted that wasn’t an option. The Legos had to go. The fight lasted until 11:59 pm.
One minute went by, the Legos doubled, and all the family members were killed in a crushing wave of Legos.
Their bodies weren’t found until a day later when the house exploded after the Legos doubled again. The first responders were confused how a single house could have so many Legos. A day later, the multiplying legos destroyed the neighbor’s houses. The news caught up with the story and the sight became a popular tourist attraction. Where had all these legos come from? After 2 tourists were killed late one night the authorities realized that the Legos doubled at 12:00 am each day.
Someone good with math realized that if the problem wasn’t dealt with quickly, it would destroy them all. All meaning the entire world. The president was called and the national government mobilized. In the time this was all going on, a day passed and the Legos doubled. The pile was growing massive.
It was decided that all the Legos would be gathered and shot into space. Sadly, they were too late. Moving the pile was near-impossible. Add that to the fact that you’d have to accomplish the feat in a single day, made it entirely-impossible.
The Legos continued to multiply and people died quickly. Some were smashed by the expanding wave. Some barricaded themselves and died when their resources ran out. Eventually the Legos multiplied beyond earth’s capacity. The Legos multiplied into space. There were so many Legos that they collided with the sun and the sun exploded.
Before this happened, the very last survivor wrote the following review on Amazon for the product “all the Legos”: This product seems somewhat dangerous. It is underpriced and too readily available. There should at least be a background check or something. 1 out of 5 stars.
