How long is the SOA’s Final Assessment?
The intended audience of this post is aspiring actuaries, nearing the halfway point of their blood-oath contract with the Society of Actuaries (SOA). For those nearing this point, I’m sure you’re completely satisfied with the thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours you handed over to the monopoly regulating board in exchange for certifying letters. After sacrificing all your finances and free evenings, analogous to a slew of missed dinner dates, the SOA ghosts you for several months. When they finally do call, they tell you you’re a 5, and unfortunately, they only date 6 or higher.
Sarcasm aside (because maybe the company hasn’t finished grading your submission and you don’t want to create a paper trail of being ungrateful to the mouth that feeds you) the SOA deserves more respect then they’re given. In a throwback to a rule from my Sunday school days: Whenever you say something mean about someone - starting with the premise that you shouldn’t - you must pair it with five nice things about them. So, before I begin my tirade, here’s a list of five things I admire about the SOA:
They are incredibly smart. I’ve listened to several of their podcasts and the SOA produces insights several leagues above my head.
They set a high, respectable bar. It means something impressive if you can pass actuarial exams - maybe that you have too much study time on your hands, but also that you’ve worked hard.
They create an atmosphere of professionalism. It’s admirable that a profession surrounding the health insurance industry, capturing people at the most vulnerable times in their life, can be respected. The SOA has done just that. They can tell someone when they’re going to die, and that person will thank them for it because the SOA did it tactfully and professionally.
They employ a great staff. Several members of my company volunteer or publish articles with the SOA. These are the staff that I want to emulate at my company.
They have a nice website. Granted, they may have too many links, but apart from that, the user interface is informative, user friendly, and aesthetically pleasing.
The tone of this post should be viewed as lighthearted smack, similar to heckling on a bro’s fantasy football draftcast. I don’t have real beef with the SOA. Mainly, I’m criticizing the grueling length of the exam - it should be shorter. I stand by the assertion. Jackson McKenzie.
Now, niceties aside, let’s answer the title question: How long is the SOA’s Final Assessment?
The SOA’s Final Assessment is so long that, in the allotted time, you could watch the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy 10 times over and still have an extra 20 minutes to submit the exam. Similar to the SOA’s sentiment toward aspiring actuaries, you’ll watch Gandalf declare 10 times: “You shall not pass!”
The SOA’s Final Assessment is so long that, in the allotted time, you could complete 3 round-trips from Sydney to Los Angeles. That’s enough time to inception 6 different people. 1 of my 6 targets would be SOA president Jennifer Gillespie; I’d incept the idea that the SOA’s Final Assessment is too long.
The SOA’s Final Assessment is so long that, in the allotted time, you could watch the entire Stranger Things, seasons 1 to 4, twice over. To earn a Netflix lifetime achievement award, it’s required that you binge Stranger Things at least once, so this would help towards that goal.
For SOA leadership reading this post - extremely unlikely that they would - they may counter with: “Yeah, you have 96 hours to complete the exam, but you’re not supposed to use that entire time with the exam. You can do other stuff during that time like: eat, sleep, and poop.”
To which I counter with: “The pass rate is less than 50%. I’ve already failed once. Why would I sleep? I’m holding my poop.”
Not only is the time a significant investment, the cost is a significant investment too. This leads to my next critical question: How much does the SOA’s Final Assessment Cost?
The SOA’s Final Assessment costs so much that, in lieu of the exam attempt, you could buy 10 annual Netflix subscriptions. Referencing a previous point, this would also help you win a Netflix lifetime achievement award. In order to win the award, you have to actually purchase the streaming service, not just mooch off of someone else.
The SOA’s Final Assessment costs so much that, in lieu of the exam attempt, you could buy 267 large chocolate malts from Sonic. That’s 387,527 calories that you’re sacrificing - 53% of your annual value (based on a 2,000 calorie diet). If you took the assessment twice, like me, the equivalent cost would cover an entire year’s worth of calories in milkshakes.
The SOA’s Final Assessment costs so much that, in lieu of the exam attempt, you could buy an HP Spectre laptop. An entire laptop. I would know since I bought the laptop recently. I took the SOA’s Final Assessment on said laptop.
Giving a voice to the other side, I imagine the SOA would counter with: “Sure, it costs $1,200 for each exam attempt, but that money is being used to pay staff, fund research, and promote exams. The textbooks don’t write themselves. Plus, didn’t your company pay for your first attempt?”
In response to the SOA’s valid counter points, I quickly switch the subject to another question: How long does it take to receive a grade on the SOA’s Final Assessment?
6 months.
Anyways, wrapping up a post that you hope doesn’t come back to bite you later, I think the SOA’s Final Assessment is too long. I had to take 2 days of PTO plus scrub all my weekend plans just to give a solid 2nd attempt. If I have to take it a 3rd time, I’m taking 4 days of PTO, buying adult diapers, and putting UberEats on speed-dial. I’ll know in November, so the result really influences how I’m spending my December holidays.
