Christmas in Colorado
I used to be an independent person. I used to be able to go to church alone, microwave my own top ramen, and easily decide between which Marvel movie to watch for the weekend. But then I met Maddie, and things changed. I.E., I lost all my interdependence skills. Now, I can’t shop for groceries, because I don’t know what I need (like, what is a rutabaga); I can’t go on a walk alone without holding someone’s hand; and, I can’t take the Greyhound down to Tillamook, because it’s no longer in the set of preferred transit options. Now we drive. Clearly, my quality of life has hit a new low, a marble countertop kind of low. Since I can’t go places alone anymore, I followed Maddie to Colorado for Christmas.
At the press conference in Denver, reporters asked me the natural question: “Jackson, is it hard to be away from family during the holidays?” I finished signing some autographs (because in this metaphor, I’m a famous athlete) and answered while popping my sponsored Hubba-Bubba, “I think we’re blowing this out of proportion.” Then, the Wrigley Company tosses me a nickel for using the product slogan.
While obviously I missed the McKenzie and Anderson traditions it didn’t feel like I was away from family. The Daniel and Ewing families have been beyond welcoming - to the point of making unaccustomed krumkake - and I feel like I have family in Colorado. Apart from the Norwegian crepe, they also made a batch of molasses cookies, one of my favorite holiday cookies. On top of all that, not to brag, but I did make the Daniel family Christmas card.
My personal stock was trading 10% higher on the Dow after the company announcement, and I’ve already added the accomplishment to my resume. The triumphant piece of postmail displays a groupshot of carefree homeless people along the Green River. Maddie, Me, Maddie’s parents, brother, aunt and uncle. Homeless only in the sense that the relaxing trip had us considering permanently unplugging from the grid. PSA: river trips are a gateway drug to homelessness. If you’re considering homelessness for yourself, please read my previous post on the matter.
Despite the warm welcome, it was still a lot to take in. Maddie’s family does Christmas hard. I’d been prepped beforehand by my Daniel promoter, but I didn’t feel the full gravity of Christmas until I’d experienced myself. The three days of jam-packed holiday traditions began almost immediately when the Spirit Airlines eagle had landed. (A brief aside on Spirit Airlines, they charged me $7 for bottled water, and I’m never flying with them again. They prey on the frugal and kick you when you’re down and dehydrated.) We took one small step out the airport and one giant leap in our relationship. I wouldn’t describe the festivities as a gauntlet - because I know some of Maddie’s family reads the blog and maybe that would be disrespectful - but I was fairly tired by the end of it. The 72-hour shower of delicious foods and incredibly thoughtful gifts slowly drained my energies. My introversion may have also been a contributing, if not main, factor.
Speaking of incredibly thoughtful gifts though, Maddie’s grandma procured two books for me - one of the top books on successful writing and along with a rare Western, which the writing book references and which had to be arduously hunted down. Maddie’s grandma spent months looking for the book, trekking deep into the interwebs until she’d found the treasure, and I would have been happy with a beanie. She also bought me a stylish beanie. I’m very thankful for all the gifts I received in Colorado.
[Insert concluding paragraph here that ties the post together well. There’s much more you’d like to write about the fun trip, mainly the relaxing week at the mountain cabin the following week, but you’re also curious to see if the Chargers can beat the Raiders in Sunday night football and would rather turn your attention to that.]
